Babyloss Awareness Week

October 9th – 15th is Babyloss Awareness week across the world. During this week families commemorate the lives of their babies, lost in pregnancy or at or soon after birth, and share memories of the all too brief time they had together. It is a week to raise awareness of the losses which affects one in five families in the UK.

The theme of this week this year, is isolation. Which is especially true at this time, due to this pandemic, this sense of isolation that people can feel has been significantly heightened.

It is important to reduce the number of people who have to deal with their loss and their grief alone, by making the subject matter less of a taboo generally. Friends and families often struggle with knowing how to support the parents of a baby who has died. The importance of good support from family and friends cannot be understated.

Here is a video of some parents sharing their experiences of talking to others about their loss.

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People will experience a range of emotions after a baby loss, and there is no one way to feel, or right way. Your responses will be impacted by a great number of things, your circumstances, your experience of miscarriage or birth, the time spent with your baby, the suddenness of the loss, the support around you. The list goes on. For some it is traumatic, and for others it is not a major event. Your own experiences are your own.

Some common feelings though are:

· Sad and tearful

· Shocked

· Confused

· Numb

· Angry

· Jealous

· Guilty

· Empty

· Lonely

· Panicky

· Accepting

You may feel unable to go out or see friends or family because it is too difficult to see pregnant women or see children. It could mean you miss out on valuable sources of comfort and support. You might have lots of people around you but none of them seem to understand how you feel or care for you in the way you would like, or you feel they do not. You might have intrusive thoughts, nightmares, flashbacks. You may have negative self-thoughts about yourself impacting your self-esteem. It’s possible you are thinking and worrying a lot, about future pregnancies about what you could have done. All of this is exhausting and draining, and you may feel you need support to find ways and strategies to support you.

Having some space and time to speak openly about how you feel without judgement or criticism can make a huge difference. A chance to understand more about yourself and develop or reconnect with your resilience and the strategies you have to cope might be what you need.

If you feel this space would be useful to you, please reach out and contact me.

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